Wednesday, December 2, 2009

bribery

Does anyone support bribery?

I was driving bike heading to buy my project materials earlier afternoon at Kelombong area just now. I had no license.

I was turning left into a junction then I was suprised there were around 6 to 7 police officers. I try to be cool and drive the bike to the right side of a lorry trying get myself cover. and hell, the police eventually run out to the road and keep pointing me to stop down.

So I purposely drive far abit from their location to have a better negotiation with the police.

police: kenapa henti jauh-jauh sini?
me: tak adalah, saya hanya mau slow slow masuk pergi tepi jalan bah.
police: tengok lesen kamu.

after few minutes,
police: kamu orang sarawak ka?
me: ya kenapa?

and the personal conversation goes on and on.
police: ahhh, kamu tak ada lesen B2 ah. kamu tahu saya boleh saman kamu rm300 - rm400 ka?
me: oh, ya kah.
police: jadi macam mana?
me: janganlah, bang. mahal tu. tolong la sikit.

police: kamu ni student?
me: ya, study kat ums. tak ada banyak duit mahu bayar saman ni.
police: apa kamu buat kat sini pandu dgn tak ada lesen?
me: hanya limpas sini mau pergi barang saja bah. Tolong la, bang? ada lain cara?

police: boleh, kamu mau saya tolong? okay bah, macam ini, saya sekarang tidak mau saman kamu tak ada lesen tapi saya saman cermin motosikal kamu yg pendek tu.
me: bah, motosikal ini sewa punya. bukan saya punya.
police: eh, saya tidak kisah tu. RM50 saja tu.
me: eh, mahal la bang. Macam mana kalau kurang sikit. Ada cara lain bah.
police: tak adalah, ini cara paling senang kalau kau mau saya tolong kau. okay ah? jangan takut. Sikit saja ni.

the officer write my name word by word. T....O....N.....Y.....

police: okay ah? saya tulis sudah ya?

fuck u. he wrote it so slowly as if trying to challenge me to speak it out.

me: ok ok, macam ini, macam mana kalau saya belanja u. Bang tolong saya, saya pun tolong. bang, okay?
police: macam mana kamu boleh tolong saya? saya sudah start tulis sikit nama kamu dah ni.
me: kita macam ni lah, kita kurangkan harga tu.
police: macam mana boleh tu.
me: mungkin saya boleh belanja kamu makan around RM20?
police: bah, okay, saya tak boleh terima tu. Kamu faham lah. saya memang tidak boleh terima tu.
me: kenapa? saya betul-betul boleh bagi ni kalau kau mau. bagus dari saya bayar boss kau saman tu.

police: bukan saya tak mau, cuma kamu tengok belakang dan tepi kau. banyak orang ni. faham-faham la
me: saya faham la, tapi saya confirm ada cara lain bagi kau bah tu.

the officer hesitate.

police: bah, tak apalah, macam ni lah, kamu simpan ja duit kamu tu. belanja kamu sendiri makan ya. kamu jalanlah saja. jangan lagi bagi saya nampak kamu di sini ya
me: bah, okay lah, bang, thank you.

lol. omg, these people.

by the way, I was lucky to get away. hahaha


3 comments:

Unknown said...

shit. The police is gay.

Mantap la ko.

"buleh ja kalu ko yang rasuah tu"

mr. hey said...

caocibai you're fucking lucky. not to mention, an asshole. i hate your bargaining skills

Unknown said...

hahaha

yeah, luckiest man alive. who wouldnt love to avoid saman or get away without anything also?